PILOT: A CAPTIVE AUDIENCEEVEN THOUGH I WASN'T BORN A "LITTLE GIRL IN A STRANGE AND FORGOTTEN COUNTRY FORMERLY KNOWN AS GERMANY" , AND I CAN'T MAGICALLY TRANSCEND SPACE-TIME, SOMEDAY I WANT TO GROW UP TO BE JUST LIKE CAPTAIN... FOR SURELY EVEN A MICRO-SECOND REALIZATION OF CAPTAIN-NESS WOULD MAKE ME ONE WITH THE UNIVERSE.
I WOULD SHARE THE DOGMAS OF CAPTAINIA WITH ALL PEOPLES OF ALL COLORS, BUT MY ONLY CAPTIVE AUDIENCE IS SNIPPY AND EVEN WORSE, HE IS ONLY CAPTIVE BECAUSE I TIED HIM TO A COUCH WHILE HE SLEPT AND HE REFUSES TO BELIEVE IN CHURCH OF CAPTAIN BECAUSE HE CALLS HIMSELF "ATHEIST".
SUCH DIRTY WORDS HE SPEAKS. I COVERED KITTY-HAWK'S EARS. NOBODY SHOULD GROW UP TO BE LIKE SNIPPY.
JUST LOOK WHERE HE IS - TIED TO A COUCH AND YELLING OBSCENITIES.
SNIPPY SHOUTS THAT CAPTAIN IS "TROLLING YOU AND MAKING STUFF UP"
CAPTAIN LIVES NOT UNDER BRIDGES, I TELL SNIPPY.
I KNOW THINGS.
SECRET THINGS, THAT THIS SLUG IS UNAWARE OF. TROUBLESOME THINGS THAT CAPTAIN SHARED WITH
PILOT: THINGS I LIKETHE TINY TAG ON MY INSIDE FOLD OF MY JACKET SAYS "SG CHRISTOPHORUS HATCHENSON".
THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE SOMEONE I LIKE.
MAYBE I KILLED THEM FOR THIS JACKET.
THIS JACKET IS SOFT AND FITTING.
I AM PILOT. CAPTAIN CALLS ME PILOT, SO I MUST BE PILOT.
I FLY THINGS. I FLEW THE CAPTAIN ONCE ON A MISSION OF GREAT IMPORTANCE. WE HAD A SKY-ACCIDENT.
CAPTAIN SAVED MY LIFE FROM THE BURNING CARCASS OF THE FLYING COW.
CAPTAIN IS MAGIC, LIKE HARRY POTTER BUT MORE MAGIC.
CAPTAIN CAN STOP CLOCKS, I KNOW BECAUSE I'VE SEEN IT. THE COW'S CLOCKS AND DIALS FROZE IN PLACE WHEN CAPTAIN GAVE THEM A STERN LOOK.
THE MIRACLES OF CAPTAIN ARE INFINITE AND GREAT.
CAPTAIN LIVES FOREVER. I HAVE PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE.
THE CITY OF THE DEAD IS MY HOME.
THE DEAD LIKE TO PLAY GAMES AND TALK TO ME,
Charles snippy: TRANSFERENTRY: 377:
For several months of torture, the Directorate kept me in their offices, making me file paperwork on their "test subjects", all while I kept sending applications to the "Dead Zone tourism" branch, to get away from towering cubes of the Directorate, away from cities and transmitter towers that were slowly frying my brain.
Centuries of industrial pollution were inevitably changing the biosphere of our world and the Directorate knew it better than anyone, yet they did nothing to stop it, profit had to be maximized, production had to be increased, customers had to be satisfied. Holes in the ozone layer, irreversible changes in the atmosphere, radioactive fallout, wild-life mutations, the days growing darker and the sky turning black - none of this mattered to them.
These changes must have been so gradual that no single generation was able to protest it.
Everyone was happily, playfully, and joyfully ignoring the world outside o
SNIPPY: FLYING DAYENTRY 3647:
November something something.
I've got to come up with a better system for telling what day it is. Maybe I could scrawl numbers on the back of my shoe? Nah, that sounds like something silly that Pilot would do.
I'm currently carrying a calendar that says 2012 on it, but I am pretty sure that these days aren't correct anyway to our year and Captain keeps scribbling things in the margins whenever I get distracted enough for the calendar to be snatched out of my hands. I found the calendar more or less intact and it's kinda impressive that it lasted from way back in 2012. It must have held some sort of personal importance to it's owner to seal it away in a plastic container with words "the Mayans were wrong, trust no-one!"
I've been trying to keep track of how old I am, but I keep forgetting to check off every day in the calendar or maybe captain is messing off with me by erasing my checkmarks.
Something tells me I shouldn't be telling Captain about my birthday anyway. I would
ENGIE: RegretsI was at first too stupid to see that we were no longer using ANNIE but Annie was using us.
She was a goddess in the machine, our search engine.
We used her to collect and share knowledge and in return she had started to use us as her processors. It was an unexpected transition and it took a long time, thus I failed to notice it, failed to stop it. The new organism had come to life in which we were only neuron cells of her massive mind, that spanned continents.
Humanity no longer had a chance to survive in it's current state. We had poisoned the oceans, we had scorched the earth and blackened the sky in our quest for power.
The world we knew was dying. I knew that this decade would be our last. The city would fall to the Zone, sooner or later.
Research notes from the last report of Charles Snippy terrified me greatly. They had found something horrid in the Dead Zone. Something that killed them all.
The Dead Zone Research and Tourism i
CAPTAIN: THE LETTERDEAD GIANT PYLON/CAT OVERLORDS,
I WAS MOST PERTURBED/DISTURBED/ANNOYED/JAXTAPOSED TO DISCOVER THAT OUR LOVELY UNIVERSE IS SHRINKING!
AS A CONSTITUENT OF THE UNIVERSE AND HIGHLY RESPECTABLE REPRESENTATIVE OF PLANET EARTH AND KING OF THE NATION OF CAPTANIA, I FIND THIS UNSUSTAINABLE DEVELOPMENT UNNACEPTABLE AND MUST INSIST THAT YOU TAKE ACTION TO RETURN THE UNIVERSE TO ITS RIGHTFUL SIZE OR AT LEAST PREVENT ANY FURTHER REDUCTIONS.
I KNOW, YOU THINK IT'S OKAY, THE UNIVERSE IS INFINITE, AND YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST IGNORE THIS ISSUE IN HOPES THAT IT WILL GO AWAY.
HOWEVER, ACCORDING TO MY CALCULATIONS, THE END OF THE UNIVERSE IS INEVITABLE AND WE HAVE ONLY 60 CYCLES LEFT AT BEST, MAYBE 80 UNTIL OUR UNIVERSE CEASES TO EXIST ENTIRELY, IT'S ENERGY PERMANENTLY SHIFTING INTO ANOTHER STATE OF EXISTENCE.
OH BEHALF OF THE PEOPLES OF CAPTANIA (POPULATION: 4) I APPEAL TO YOUR HYPER-GALACTIC-MIND TO CONSIDER MY CASE AND HAVE IT REVIEWED BEFORE THE END O
Charles Snippy: DreamsEntry 382:
My personal online psychiatrist is making me narrate this nonsense down on the chip embedded in my tooth in hopes that someday I may be cured of my "incompatibility" with ANNET, or at least possibly reduce the "mild psychosis caused by work-related stress" as she calls it.
I know that it's not going to happen. The problem is something genetic and while those goons in the genetics department would love to get their machines into my brain, I prefer the lack of sleep and headaches to lobotomy.
I seen the reports on their test subjects: "total neural shut-down", "subject resists integration with the net, increasing the signal strength lead to damage to the 85% of the frontal lobe."
Call me old fashioned, but I like my brain the way it is.
I've had that day-dream again. Day-mare is more likely.
A flash-mare? Not sure what to call these, really.
The transmitter towers dotting this bloody city are making my life difficult, but not as difficult as the fact that everyone expects me t
SNIPPY: REMEMBERANCES OF THE PAST DAYOctober something, something.
Today captain declared as "REMEMBERANCES OF THE PAST DAY".
The day begun with me getting smacked with a broken laptop and yells "YOU'VE GOT MAIL!".
I tried to protest that laptops weren't attacking people in the mornings back in the past. To this, Captain declared that in fact they didn't have to, because users were so addicted to reading their daily mail facts that every morning they woke up smacking their heads on their laptops.
Then my head was treated to a barrage of empty, metal SPAM cans with words "SPAM MAIL! DODGE THE SPAM! USE FILTERS!".
With these words, captain gave me two old tennis rackets. The tennis rackets had yellow duck-tape stickers on them with words "DELETE" and "BLOCK EMAIL ADDRESS".
The spam can attack didn't end there, Pilot's job for today was hiding behind building ruins and throwing the spam cans at me at random intervals with yells of "INCREASE YOUR GENITAL SIZE!", "RUSSIAN BRIDE LOVES YOU" and "I AM NIGERIAN PRINCE WITH 56 BILL
Pilot: SHOEDEAR SHOE,
THAT'S RIGHT YOU ARE A SHOE.
THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT NOT BEING A SHOE BECAUSE IN MY MIND YOU ARE ONE AND THAT IS MOST UNFORTUNATE.
AS LONG AS I HAVE YOU CONCEPTUALIZED AS A SHOE IN MY IMAGINATION YOU SHALL REMAIN AS SUCH.
THIS MAKES ME WONDER WHETHER ALL PEOPLES AND OBJECTS CAN BE CONCEPTUALIZED AS SHOES AND THUS BECOME SUCH, GRANTING ME ABSOLUTE POWER OVER THEM. DOES SNIPPY HAVE A CLEVER ARGUMENT? NO HE DOESN'T, HE'S A SHOE. SHOES CAN'T HAVE CLEVER ARGUMENTS.
I FEEL LIKE THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD HAS BEEN LIFTED OFF MY SHOULDERS NOW THAT EVERYTHING IS UNDER MY CONTROL, NOW THAT YOU ARE ALL SHOES. I NO LONGER HAVE TO ANSWER TO MY REGRETS AND PAST MISTAKES BECAUSE THEY ARE SIMPLY SHOES.
I WAS EVEN ABLE TO PAINT PHOTOSHOP IN PURPLE COLOR (TO PLEASE CAPTAIN) AND SHE DIDN'T EVEN PUT UP A PROPER FIGHT BECAUSE I IMAGINED HER AS A SHOE.
MAYBE I CAN IMAGINE THE
SNIPPY: BIOGRAPHICAL DATA 001ENTRY 9997:
To anyone who finds these memory cards,
and the messages left within...
My name is Charles Snippy. I am probably the last sane human being left on earth. I know not whether you will understand this message. I know not whether you'll even be able to decode the ones and zeros on these data cards. I know not whether my voice will even reach anyone.
I know not, whether the microscopic drives will last long enough and whether the plastic and metal which composes them will not disintegrate into dust as centuries pass or whether the titanium shell encasing them will remain in place or be consumed by the ever-changing landscape, lost forever.
And yet I still have hope that someone will find the story of my life, long past and learns something of use from it.
If you are still human, then this will be a story about the collapse of civilization of your forefathers through greed and arrogance.
If you are some other species entirely, then it is a story about how our human race was extin
ENGIE: PROTOCOL 1-1-3Zee Captain's note of summons had sealed my fate.
I felt a cold pull at my stomach. Something else was coming, re-awakened by the presence of Captain.
Something worse than the shuffling noises of the red beasts outside. The sound of falling cannonball.
Whatever that fleshy monstrosity was, it cared not for me, but it's presence here led ANNIE straight to me.
...And it came to pass on the morrow, that the goddess in the machine came upon me and she wanted vengeance.
She was online, the thermonuclear bombardment of the core databank cube had failed to shut her down.
She was still alive, after all these years.
The explosive crash-landing of the hunter machine through the old roof drew THEIR attention.
I was now between two wild beasts, out for my blood.
What was Protocol 1-1-3?
Memories of Directorate weapon codes lingered in my mind, poisoning my thought pattern.
Could it be?
...So this was to be my death.
ANNIE had let me know that she
SNIPPY: ON THE ROAD TO...September something something.
Sadly this chip is only good for recording and not for playback.
I've definitely long lost track of time, traveling with Captain from one part of the city to another.
It's probably not even September, but most likely October. Anyway it doesn't really matter, because it's always cold thanks to nuclear winter and it's always either snowing or "ashening" with rare instances of sunlight breaking through the thick, gloomy, black clouds overhead.
I've made many mistakes in my past, and I don't have much to look forward in the future, but yet I keep living for some reason, even if that reason is captain's continuous entertainment.
Everyday before I fall asleep I think of what horrible things the captain will do tomorrow. This week the bastard kept dressing me up in ridiculous outfits and giving me new "personalities to play". Where does one find the time to dig up costumes? Yesterday I woke up all dressed up like an old lady a
Snippy: poem of doomI've a lot of time on my hands living inside the whale and such. ....So, today I wrote a poem about Captain:
Oh Captain, my Captain! I say it to mock,
You're lucky as hell but to me you're a c***.
Please spare me the missions, I've no head for heights,
Balloons and big lists lead me only to blights.
Evading the probes of an alien race,
Then having to witness your > : ( angry face...
But what choice have I? I'm involved in these fights,
With Cancerous space-monsters full of red sprites,
And Lemonade weirdos and God knows what next,
Just how can you stay so serene and unvexed?
What price should I pay for your simple delights,
Be eaten by whales after soiling my whites?
I know you won't listen, but you'll come unstuck,
And one of these days you'll run right out of luck,
Your empire will fall, and your ego besides,
It's karma for sure, like the turn of the tides,
And then I will lol, sitting in my own muck,
Coz after all this I just won't
Biomass 117: DISCONNECTED AVATAROn StArDaTe 230387455652769 A TrIaL Has CoMmeNcEd, To EvaLuAte ThE LoSs oF InVaDer UnIoN Ship 4920-938
It WaS DiScoVeRed ThEn,
ThAt ThE SiNgULaRitY KnoWn As CaPtaIn ComiTtED A SeRieS of CriMeS AgAiNsT The UniOn.
AnD So, By ThE OrDeR Of ThE InVaDeRs UniOn,
We WeRe SuMmOneD AnD
To ThiS WoRlD On ThE TeTrA-ViRuS SeEdS.
To InFeCt aNd To UnItE AlL LiViNg LoCaL MulTiCeLlULaRs As BiOMaSs 117, The MoSt UnStoPpaBLe aNd FaIr JuDgE oF AlL.
LifE alwAys fInDs a wAy.
WhilE wE scAnNed the
Sungmin and new years!! endings are always sad...First of all, I happen to find it highly amusing as my Bias's are already in 2012 and I'm still in 2011~~ I saw this on tumblr and it made me laugh :iconyesvictoryplz: because it said
'My bias it from the future!!'
X3 yes yes! I told you they were amazing~ :icondignitylaughplz:
Second of all I want to say a MASSIVE HAPPY BIRTHDAY to the beautiful Sungmin!! :iconamgtouchplz::iconsaranghaeplz:
This is for you Sungmin!! TAKE IT AWAY!! :iconsungminiplz: >
:icontheburbster: MY SUPER SMEXII CUTE TWIN!! :iconbummiesplz::iconfeelingfreeplz: nuth said... <3<3
:iconKairuxRiisu: A beautful person! inside and out~ who has a very cute personallity ^ ^ and great art! *W* Mei!! <3<3
:iconmiamoure: Both talented and such an awesome person to get a long with!! My Aiko-chan! >w
Hall Of Fame ( 29 - September 2012 ) Before talking about the features, I want to present something briefly. For those who still care and who would like to make a change in someone’s life, you are free to share your ideas concerning our project called The "Think About It" Project. Your opinion counts! And no, we are NOT expecting donations of any kind etc. , because this project isn’t based on any financial principle. Details can be found on the official updated website: www.thethinkaboutitproject.com.
Those who have been members of our Group for quite a while are aware of the fact that many of the Group's Submissions end up in my, Alligatorr's, gppr’s, Mathness', Rockinfroggi's and pbird12's Favourites, being featured wherever it is possible to do that and being suggested as DDs. So, keep submitting, people, because there are only advantages in it for you.
Look at this! It made me lol XDWARNING: This is a real interview
----(1)IN YOUR MIND, WHAT COLOUR IS SUPER JUNIOR?----
Shindong: Black. Black is the most extreme of all colours.
Eeteuk: My most favourite colour white. No colour is as pure as white.
Ryeowook: White. Actually I'm not too sure what colour describes Super Junior but white is a colour that is filled with possibilities.
Kibum: White. Because no colour can fully describe Super Junior.
Sungmin: Transparent. Because no colour can represent Super Junior.
Eunhyuk: Sapphire blue. It's our representative colour. Seeing this colour will make you think of us.
/Donghae: Rainbow colour. (:'D ahhh~ good old Hae)
Siwon: Sapphire blue. The colour of Super Junior and E.L.F.
Yesung: Sapphire blue. The club colour of our balloons.
Hankyung: White. The colour of pure, drifting white clouds.
----(2)WHO IS THE STINGIEST MEMBER?----
Shindong: Eunhyuk? Yesung? Eunhyuk really doesn't spend much
Comments and Commenting We all know that getting the exposure you want for your work is a tough endeavour here on dA. Despite the wonders of the site, the simple fact of the matter is that comments are hard to come by these days.
There may be many reasons for this - lack of time on the part of many browsers, lack of interest, or simply: not knowing what to say. We've all been there at one point (some of us more than others), and it presented the question - "what is it that writers want out of a comment?"
The only way to find the answer to this question was to set up a poll - which received an amazing response from the lit community, and with your help, this editorial will highlight some points that will aid in leaving some insightful and appreciated comments.
First and foremost - Read.
Many of the writers on dA want f
FlatteredI should be flattered.
There are people who literally spend hours of their life every day following me. People who obsessively save every work of art I post online. People who comment and hypothesize about everything I do, even when I am not doing anything. People who make their own comics, websites, and blogs because of me. People who meticulously sift through my stats, my comments, and near-decade old journals. People who obsessively screen-capture everything I say or do anywhere online. People who seemingly have no life other than to talk about every aspect of my own. People who, day in and day out, never tire of talking about me to their friends online.
These people are amazing and I am continually astounded by them and the things they come up with... over a worthless and unimportant cartoonist.
Not even a good cartoonist either. Just an average, slightly stubborn, mediocrely popular on a dubious website... cartoonist. Not a politician with real influence in the world. Not a famous
Project Educate 2011-2012 Part 2
11thIntroduction!Welcome to Digital Dolls!Dolling 101 (Or Dolling For Beginners)Interview with LadyHazy12thHistory and Interview!History of DollingInterview with Metroid-Tamer!13thPageants!Intro to Pageants14thInterview and Resources!
Sorry to bother you...Hello all,
I thought I'd take a moment today to write a journal which is probably long overdue. I believe there is a common misconception floating around that CVs are so busy, that when you send us DD Suggestions, or other messages, you are being a bother.
Quite regularly the DD Suggestions I receive start with something along the lines of "I am sorry to bother you..." or "I know you are busy but.."
I'd like to assure you all that no suggestions you send, or any other type of contact made with me (or any other CV for that matter) is something to feel sorry or bad about (unless you are legitimately harassing us or something).
I've often heard community members talk about how many notes CVs get daily (often this number appears to be near 100) and I feel the need to say that this is very far from the truth. On average I receive maybe 5 notes a day. On a slow day I may not get any at all and on a busy day I may get up to 10. While I can not speak
New and Unknown Manipulators #1 and Member Feature New and Unknown Manipulators
this is my new collection of features that will show five artists per week,
some are new that started little time on deviantart, and others unknown, that both deserve highlight for all to see their works
and do not forget to support these artists visiting their gallery [send feedback ]
Sweet Girl by Rochaluarts
The Portal by Rochaluarts