|Deviant Login||Shop||Join deviantART for FREE||Take the Tour|
Devious Journal EntryGood ol' alexiuss has been using my computer all day and forgot to log out of his DA account, so this is him getting trolled.
With love, Humon.
ENGIE: RegretsI was at first too stupid to see that we were no longer using ANNIE but Annie was using us.
She was a goddess in the machine, our search engine.
We used her to collect and share knowledge and in return she had started to use us as her processors. It was an unexpected transition and it took a long time, thus I failed to notice it, failed to stop it. The new organism had come to life in which we were only neuron cells of her massive mind, that spanned continents.
Humanity no longer had a chance to survive in it's current state. We had poisoned the oceans, we had scorched the earth and blackened the sky in our quest for power.
The world we knew was dying. I knew that this decade would be our last. The city would fall to the Zone, sooner or later.
Research notes from the last report of Charles Snippy terrified me greatly. They had found something horrid in the Dead Zone. Something that killed them all.
The Dead Zone Research and Tourism i
PILOT: THINGS I LIKETHE TINY TAG ON MY INSIDE FOLD OF MY JACKET SAYS "SG CHRISTOPHORUS HATCHENSON".
THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE SOMEONE I LIKE.
MAYBE I KILLED THEM FOR THIS JACKET.
THIS JACKET IS SOFT AND FITTING.
I AM PILOT. CAPTAIN CALLS ME PILOT, SO I MUST BE PILOT.
I FLY THINGS. I FLEW THE CAPTAIN ONCE ON A MISSION OF GREAT IMPORTANCE. WE HAD A SKY-ACCIDENT.
CAPTAIN SAVED MY LIFE FROM THE BURNING CARCASS OF THE FLYING COW.
CAPTAIN IS MAGIC, LIKE HARRY POTTER BUT MORE MAGIC.
CAPTAIN CAN STOP CLOCKS, I KNOW BECAUSE I'VE SEEN IT. THE COW'S CLOCKS AND DIALS FROZE IN PLACE WHEN CAPTAIN GAVE THEM A STERN LOOK.
THE MIRACLES OF CAPTAIN ARE INFINITE AND GREAT.
CAPTAIN LIVES FOREVER. I HAVE PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE.
THE CITY OF THE DEAD IS MY HOME.
THE DEAD LIKE TO PLAY GAMES AND TALK TO ME,
THE CHURCH OF GOOGLISMSTEP 1: The problem.
You have a problem.
Don't tell me you don't have problems.
Everyone has problems.
Determine what your biggest problem is.
Don't have a big problem? Too scared to admit it?
You can start smaller- How about a small problem?
How about something that concerns/bothers/confuses you today/this week/recently?
Come up with a bunch of keywords that describe your problem.
STEP 2: Ask google for solution to your problem.
Google your question using ALL the possible keyword combinations that your problem relates to or has in it.
See if anyone already has a similar problem or has already resolved it.
Take 3 hours if you must.
Finding correct information can get tough, especially if it is obscure, hidden, answered incorrectly or has conflicting answers.
Answers without proper sources or evidence are generally incorrect and should be disregarded.
If there are too many conflicting solutions and opposing answers and you're not sure which is correct,
Use the principle of
SNIPPY: QUESTIONABLE REALITYI definitely thought about killing Captain, especially after several pranks that were pulled on me like that time when I woke up with a bucket super-glued to my head and declared "iron man".
Or that time when Captain made a soup out of my gas mask filters because the broth needed the "Smooth flavour of Snippy" and salt wasn't available... so I had to roam the decaying shopping malls for a new pair.
Or that time when Captain pushed me into a watery abyss inside a wooden barrel to celebrate "Niagara falls day".
Have my thoughts become so compounded as to finally cause schizophrenia?
...Am I a stone throw away from becoming like Pilot, talking to pet rocks and building the Bastion of Captania out of rotting shoe boxes?
And if I were to kill Captain who would I have left?
I must have been talking out loud like those crazy hobos that lived outside the protectorate dome that communicated with radioactive rain clouds via conversations of interpretive dance, until they were consumed by a famil
PILOT: A CAPTIVE AUDIENCEEVEN THOUGH I WASN'T BORN A "LITTLE GIRL IN A STRANGE AND FORGOTTEN COUNTRY FORMERLY KNOWN AS GERMANY" , AND I CAN'T MAGICALLY TRANSCEND SPACE-TIME, SOMEDAY I WANT TO GROW UP TO BE JUST LIKE CAPTAIN... FOR SURELY EVEN A MICRO-SECOND REALIZATION OF CAPTAIN-NESS WOULD MAKE ME ONE WITH THE UNIVERSE.
I WOULD SHARE THE DOGMAS OF CAPTAINIA WITH ALL PEOPLES OF ALL COLORS, BUT MY ONLY CAPTIVE AUDIENCE IS SNIPPY AND EVEN WORSE, HE IS ONLY CAPTIVE BECAUSE I TIED HIM TO A COUCH WHILE HE SLEPT AND HE REFUSES TO BELIEVE IN CHURCH OF CAPTAIN BECAUSE HE CALLS HIMSELF "ATHEIST".
SUCH DIRTY WORDS HE SPEAKS. I COVERED KITTY-HAWK'S EARS. NOBODY SHOULD GROW UP TO BE LIKE SNIPPY.
JUST LOOK WHERE HE IS - TIED TO A COUCH AND YELLING OBSCENITIES.
SNIPPY SHOUTS THAT CAPTAIN IS "TROLLING YOU AND MAKING STUFF UP"
CAPTAIN LIVES NOT UNDER BRIDGES, I TELL SNIPPY.
I KNOW THINGS.
SECRET THINGS, THAT THIS SLUG IS UNAWARE OF. TROUBLESOME THINGS THAT CAPTAIN SHARED WITH
SNIPPY: ON THE ROAD TO...September something something.
Sadly this chip is only good for recording and not for playback.
I've definitely long lost track of time, traveling with Captain from one part of the city to another.
It's probably not even September, but most likely October. Anyway it doesn't really matter, because it's always cold thanks to nuclear winter and it's always either snowing or "ashening" with rare instances of sunlight breaking through the thick, gloomy, black clouds overhead.
I've made many mistakes in my past, and I don't have much to look forward in the future, but yet I keep living for some reason, even if that reason is captain's continuous entertainment.
Everyday before I fall asleep I think of what horrible things the captain will do tomorrow. This week the bastard kept dressing me up in ridiculous outfits and giving me new "personalities to play". Where does one find the time to dig up costumes? Yesterday I woke up all dressed up like an old lady a
Charles snippy: TRANSFERENTRY: 377:
For several months of torture, the Directorate kept me in their offices, making me file paperwork on their "test subjects", all while I kept sending applications to the "Dead Zone tourism" branch, to get away from towering cubes of the Directorate, away from cities and transmitter towers that were slowly frying my brain.
Centuries of industrial pollution were inevitably changing the biosphere of our world and the Directorate knew it better than anyone, yet they did nothing to stop it, profit had to be maximized, production had to be increased, customers had to be satisfied. Holes in the ozone layer, irreversible changes in the atmosphere, radioactive fallout, wild-life mutations, the days growing darker and the sky turning black - none of this mattered to them.
These changes must have been so gradual that no single generation was able to protest it.
Everyone was happily, playfully, and joyfully ignoring the world outside o
SNIPPY: REMEMBERANCES OF THE PAST DAYOctober something, something.
Today captain declared as "REMEMBERANCES OF THE PAST DAY".
The day begun with me getting smacked with a broken laptop and yells "YOU'VE GOT MAIL!".
I tried to protest that laptops weren't attacking people in the mornings back in the past. To this, Captain declared that in fact they didn't have to, because users were so addicted to reading their daily mail facts that every morning they woke up smacking their heads on their laptops.
Then my head was treated to a barrage of empty, metal SPAM cans with words "SPAM MAIL! DODGE THE SPAM! USE FILTERS!".
With these words, captain gave me two old tennis rackets. The tennis rackets had yellow duck-tape stickers on them with words "DELETE" and "BLOCK EMAIL ADDRESS".
The spam can attack didn't end there, Pilot's job for today was hiding behind building ruins and throwing the spam cans at me at random intervals with yells of "INCREASE YOUR GENITAL SIZE!", "RUSSIAN BRIDE LOVES YOU" and "I AM NIGERIAN PRINCE WITH 56 BILL
Journal.exe Stupid title not letting me use backslash aldkfjh--
[Bullet; Black][Bullet; Black][Bullet; Black][Bullet; Black][Bullet; Black][Bullet; Black]
[Bullet; Red] I will be doing a live interview in DeviantArt's dAmn Chatrooms on Sunday, July 29, at 7:00PM (Pacific Standard Time).
[Bullet; Orange] During the interview, you will be able to contribute questions and chat freely with other artists in a public room while questions are answered in live-time in a separate, private room.
[Star!] Interviews are held in our dAmn Chatrooms --> http://chat.deviantart.com/chat/AtAChat and http://chat.deviantart.com/chat/ATAInterview ... During an interview, you must be in both chatrooms. One is where you watch the interview, and one is where you ask the questions. Rooms will be open and interview with SilentReaper will be held on Sunday, July 29,
My Best Motivational TipWhen I become overcome with the guilt and shame and fear as a result of my constant procrastination, I have one trick to get me off my ass that works every time.
Now, lots of other people and blogs and whatever are all like "look how lucky you are" and "puppies and rainbows" and "if you get it done now, you'll feel better" and lots of other positive shit. While all this stuff is true, I'm still playing Assassin's Creed II for like four hours a day. It doesn't motivate me at all. I still don't want to write a 500 word essay on the subtle differences between the book and the film adaptation of The Road that's due, like, tomorrow.
So here's what I think of.
"Michael Bay wants me to fail."
Insert your own celebrity arch nemesis if you want to, but basically choose someone so crap that it makes you angry. Preferably someone who's getting paid buckets of money to do whatever they do to piss you off.
Competitive nature and the desire to prove your chosen asshole wrong should take over.
a tale of butterOnce you start reading this, you cannot turn back.
Well you could, but would you reeeeeeeeally want to do it?
KEEP ON READING OR YOUR EYES WILL IMPLODE.
One day, humon was surfing the internet.
She was just looking at her favorite pages when all of a sudden a new tab opened up.
She was confused, since she didn't click on any link whatsoever. The tab didn't show anything, just a white screen. When she tried to close the tab, nothing happened. She kept pressing the X to close it, but instead the tab turned to full size. Suddenly, the white screen of the tab turned completely black.
It wasn't only the tab screen that turned black, all the button and everything else on her screen did the same.
Even her mouse disappeared off the screen.
After a little while, she decided to turn her computer off because she simply thought it was broken.
This was a fatal mistake.
Out of nowhere, a full screen picture of :iconcaptainfanclub: appeared on the black screen.
It was most unexpected.
As she loo
Your monthly reminder of YOU CAN DO ITWHATEVER YOU ARE GOING THROUGH RIGHT NOW YOU CAN TAKE IT ON SON
Like YOU TOTALLY GOT THIS
and even if you feel like you can't, ITS OK
Things happen and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger
SO REMEMBER THAT
FIGHT THROUGH THE DAY
CARRY IT ON, don't disappoint me, don't ever give up!
Good on you for making it this far because good lord you could be in worse situations so goodness son go to the mirror and look at yourself and tell yourself YO I CAN DO THIS
because I believe in you!!
Don't disappoint me, now go, CHIN UP, BRO
10x 100 DA Points Giveaway - Winner #51000 Free points to give away - Round #5 CLOSED!
Do you want to win some free deviantPOINTS and additionally get a triple chance to win?? This is Round #5 of 10 rounds where 1000 points altogether will find new owners. In order to participate you have to do this:
First of all:
READ THE RULES!
(Scroll down a bit!)
FAV this journal
Post a COMMENT in this journal (only one please)
Do ONE of the 3 following options:
LIKE my Facebook Page
The Chromatic Deck
if you don't have a Facebook account FAV this deviation:
The Chromatic Deck
if you have liked the page and faved the cards already SUGGEST A DD for one of the following works from other artists:
Free Key Giveaway # 5 - CLOSED EDIT: WINNER IS #491! THE KEY WILL GO TO :iconDJEZC:
Thanks everyone! Check back next week for a new contest!
Giveaway #5 is now CLOSED, we'll upload a new journal next friday for #6!
Free Key Giveaway
Each week we will be giving away 1 key for free to say thanks for all the support.
So what do you have to do to win one?
PLEASE READ EVERYTHING BELOW BEFORE POSTING
Just post on this journal. Post anything you want. Say hello, tell us a joke, give us a funny plz account. Anything.
From when we post this journal, you'll have 24 hours to put your name here.
Please only comment once. If you comment twice, you will be disqualified.
We'll count up how many people commented and then we'll use the random number generator to pick a number: http://www.random.org/
We start from oldest comment first (#1), and the person whose number is generated will g
Fav this journal, you might get points! - CLOSED!January is the month of giveaways
:iconoptimusprimeplz: WE ARE ON A ROLL!
January is our birth month, and thus it is the month of giveaways!
What do you do in this giveaway?
If you want to enter, all you have to do is this journal!
R U L E S
- You don't have to be a member to participate.
- The deadline of this giveaway is Thursday, January 26, 2012 at 4:00PM EST.
After 4:00PM EST, I (Jazzs-girl-4ever) will use a random number generator. Once you fav this journal, you automatically have a number next to your username. Whichever number the random number generator comes out with wins 50 ! (Whoever has that number next to them)
The random number is: 64!
Is possible to travel?...and perhaps I thought it wasn't possible.
On this journal I'd like to clarify a few things about travels and the truth with it.
So, let's start from very basic questions or comments from people which I get very often on dA: you are so lucky to be able to afford traveling!, I so wish I were as lucky as you being able to travel or How you can afford? You must have decent finances and the time!
Didn't you happen to think like that? If you did, so that is just a stereotype.
On almost every question or their comment where I explain what it is really and how it's working - it is a big opposite side of mirror what they think. After hearing they get usually shocked, but more in positive way.
Here we go.
Firstly, there is a big difference being a traveler and a tourist.
Secondy, there is a huge difference to travel via third party (travel agencies, school trips, going for trips with a friend, family, organizations, etc.) and lonely, self organized travels. And where you
Two Thousand and Not TwelveFirst of all,
I would like to thank everyone for the Birthday Wishes back in December I tried answering all or most of your Birthday/Holiday wishes, and I am really sorry if I missed your comment! If you did not get a response from me or if you had a question, please feel free to send me a note anytime and I'll get back to you
Second, I know I went missing for about two months but I'm hoping that things will start slowing down again so I can work on comics and other art-related things. I have a bunch of tm Comics lined up since... 4 months ago... and I'm hoping to actually work on them soon (Along with StupidFox, of course). But mainly during these past two months, I've been doing a lot of sketching and going back on working with old mediums.
Warning: This is a Beginning of a Rant
Recently, I've realized that I do not have as much time to work on art as I did one year ago. And I l
wedding timesI got married to :iconmeeshkamodel: , yay.
See if you can spot the person who plays/inspired the personality of :iconpilotfanclub: in this picture:
(hint: the gaze bores into your soul)
Much wedding cake was had, almost as much as was thrown at our table during MCM london show (after Captain demanded cake) and 40+ cakes and cupcakes were brought.
You can support RA / send us a wedding gift via:
Keep in Touch!
Bluefley has a gallery filled with artwork that whisks you off in to a Sci-fi daydream, and keeps you captivated for hours. Marc has been a member of our community for over a decade and has achieved nothing but success with his astounding commitment to interacting with the community, sharing a prolific amount of video tutorials and generally being an all round rockstar deviant. It is no joke that we are absolutely delighted to award the Deviousness Award for April 2014 to ... Read More